Little things that feel like Big things

I’m off to work on the bus today. Its going to be a good day; the sun is shining for the first time in weeks, I’ve got a bit of work to get done this morning, and then this afternoon, we’ve got a company barbecue – a few drinks paid for, a decent bunch of people for the most part, and I’ve told everyone (up to and including the CEO) that it’ll cost them beer to talk shop to me after the first pint.

And I’m wearing metallic blue nail varnish.

I’m not in the closet at work, but neither am I out of it. I think I present at the flamboyant end of straight, I wear a rainbow lanyard, and I’ve expressed my enthusiasm for taking a leadership role in the Pride Network that I’ve agitated for and that’s about to be announced, but I haven’t come out as… what? A cross-dressing pansexual? I can’t use that description; it invites a hundred more questions that require gender studies basics to explain, and my company is predominantly straight/white/middle aged/men and heavily ex-military. They’d understand, but my capacity for repeated explanation is limited. I’ll probably just go with queer. Or bisexual, and you can fuck off with the follow-up questions.

I’m wearing metallic blue nail varnish, and I don’t have the time, equipment or opportunity to remove it.

Our company’s big D&I awareness campaign (and the Pride kick off) don’t happen until next week – it’d have been really helpful if it had been last week, but today is definitely the day to start being neutrally out instead of neutrally in the closet. Low-pressure work social.

Also, I’m not the only gay in the village – there’s at least one other non-straight (but about 400 people are going to be at the barbie). There are definitely others, and I feel a really strong need to be visible for them. I’m reasonably senior and reasonably respected and disproportionately well recognised in the company, and I need to advocate for those who are less comfortable than I am. But it doesn’t feel very comfortable to me right at this moment.

I know they won’t care, but what if they do?

I know they’ll be supportive, but what if they’re not?

I know they’ll be respectful (or at least not intentionally disrespectful), but what if they’re not?

I know it won’t be career limiting, but what if it kind of subtly is?

And all this from an unspoken message I’m sending by wearing nail varnish FFS. What if I’d really gone for it and work a long, silky wrap skirt?

Oh well, that’ll just have to wait for the Christmas bash.

Wish me luck.

Senses – Erotic Journal Challenge Submission

The sense I love the most out of all of them isn’t one with a name, at least not one that I know of. Or, definitely not just one name; but it’s definitely one sense and with one source.

It’s the sense of warmth and comfort when I get changed after work, and pinch a pair of her satin pyjama shorts to wear under my pyjamas, knowing that she’ll be delighted and turned on when she discovers this later.

Continue reading Senses – Erotic Journal Challenge Submission

New Year Break

This is my wonderful Helena’s post capturing our rather chilled couple of nights in rural Wales.

I realise our definition of chilled is quite different from everyone else’s, but we enjoyed the fuck out of it!

Captured Soul

Raoul and I had a much needed planned break for a couple of days over New Year, remote part of Wales, hot tub and photos ideas on an isolated beach. Relaxation was had, the hot tub utilised but the beach photos didn’t work out (too many people and not the right frame of mind). However, an idea struck me in the hot tub and my ever willing partner ran with it, it was certainly fun to do and much warmer than the beach!

P.S It’s really difficult trying to float in a hot tub!

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Eyes – Kink of the Week

If you want to hear me read this, dripping filth directly into your ear, try this. You probably want headphones or privacy. Ideally both …

You were standing in the kitchen when I got home, putting away the last couple of bits of shopping. You heard me drop my keys in the bowl by the front door, and called out a hello, and I replied in kind.

“How was your day?”

“Antsy! Nothing in particular, just a low tolerance for for stupid people in supermarkets. Oh, and all the idiots seemed to be out on the roads today.”

I step up behind you and wrap my arms around your waist, nuzzling your neck.

“Well it’s chill time. I’ll make dinner in a bit. Risotto?”

“Mmmmm” is the only reply I get.

“If you’re antsy, does this help, or make it worse?” I ask as my left hand comes up to hold your right breast through your blouse. You release a quiet gasp and wriggle your hips into my groin.

Continue reading Eyes – Kink of the Week

Elust 113

By Quinn Rhodes a picture of a Doxy on a white hotel bed for Elust 113

Photo courtesy of Quinn Rhodes

Welcome to Elust 113

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #114? Start with the rules, come back January1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

 

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

The Source of Control

Town Use

FOMO is NOT how my vagina feels about sex.

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

The Weight of my Red Self

Mistletoe kisses

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

If you want a job done
Continue reading Elust 113